Who am I?

Have you ever wondered what could the answer to this question be?

Last night I randomly picked out a book from my library at home and decided to read the first 20 pages of the book to kill my boredom. I picked up Sophie's World by Jostein Gaarder. By the time I reached the fifth page, I was completely absorbed into it. I came across this question "Who are you?" asked to Sophie in an anonymous letter, and couldn't help but ask myself the same.

Who am I? I asked myself, and the very first answer that came to my mind was, "I am Alisha Thomas!" But then, I went on to think, who the hell is Alisha Thomas? It was then that I sat down and began writing the answer to this question and to my own surprise, I could define myself in more than fifty different ways!

Sometimes, out of the blue when we sit down and let random thoughts into our minds, we'd be surprised at how creative we can get, and to what extent we can explore possibilities within ourselves.

Long Days

There have been long days in my life before,

But not a one like this;

So dark, so lonely, so painful n harsh,

That the ones before seem like bliss.

I was sitting in solitude,

And thinking about the past;

Memories that I want to forget,

But in my mind they seem to last.

In anticipation that the sun will shine,

And the darkness pass away;

I wait for you to walk in n smile,

And make my heart sway.

But alas my waiting is all in vain,

'Cause you never come;

I wonder about our love,

And what it has become.

The long day has still not ended,

For I am still waiting;

I'm waiting for you to come,

Come home to my love n back into my life.

Monsoons……. A season closest to my heart

Raindrops keep fallin’ on my head……. Every time I hear this song, childhood memories flood my mind.

Having grown up in Mumbai, where Monsoons are pretty rough and the rainfall is generally heavy, monsoons have always marked special occasions in my life. Whether it was moving to a new class at the beginning of a new academic year, or something as simple as ganging up with friends and dancing in the rain. It’s all been a part of growing up, a part of my life that will always remain close to my heart!!

Memories of bygones, the fun, the laughter, those carefree days, I miss them all, and wonder whether life would ever be the same. I could just dance in the rain with friends, or eat garam garam butthas at Marine Drive with the waves lashing at the rocks and rain drops falling on my head.

Those were the days when simple things gave me pleasure, when small things made me smile. I wonder where it’s lost now. I wonder where it's gone? Amidst ambitions, long working hours, financial needs, future plans, all those beautiful ol’ times seem so far away. Sometimes I sit and wonder, what am I getting at? Why can’t I derive pleasure and happiness from small things in life? Why can’t I just get myself to dance in the rain again, like I used to, for so many years as a kid. Why can’t I relive that anticipation and excitement of going to the next class as I used to when I was younger.

As we grow up, most of us get lost in our daily mundane chores that leave us no time to experience what we used to love the most. We run behind material things without even realizing what we’re probably missing by ignoring the small joys that come our way.

Every time I stand in my balcony and watch the rain, I wonder, what stops me from taking a walk in the rain like I used to. I wonder why I am worried about what people would say. Those little joys that could fill my life with happiness are just around the corner, but something stops me from getting to them, and that something is my own reservations.

Maybe sometime soon, I will chuck those reservations, and just take a walk in the rain like I used to, and have fun like always, and experience the sheer thrill of it, just the same way as I used to as a small child. I will let the monsoons touch my soul like it used to when I was younger and feel the joy of it.

Rain Rain, come my way, and let me play again today!